A new kind of normal

Seven weeks ago, our family grew again. Baby Nathan joined us, after a surprisingly short labor, and life would  never be the same again.

Nathan is a sweet, happy baby, and well loved by his big brothers, not to mention his parents. He's a big boy, and growing fast. I don't remember the other two outgrowing their carseats and baby carriers so quickly. But he is undeniably a blessing and a joy.

I spent the first half of this pregnancy afraid of losing him, and the second half being more uncomfortable than I thought I could stand. I was so tired, and just sore all the time. I fear my boys suffered from my lack of energy, but there were enough things to keep us busy, and out of the house. Thankfully they didn't require ME to move too much. =)

Almost as soon as I had Nathan, I felt SO much better. Of course, I was tired, but being able to move again was so wonderful! I felt so good, I may have overexerted myself a few times. =)

Then, John went back to work, and my mother left. And, I realized how much had really changed. Suddenly there were three little boys needing my attention. Three little boys who were hungry, usually at the same time, two older boys who quickly discovered Mommy's lessened ability to move when she was nursing. No to mention, I was still tired from the lessened sleep. The house quickly deteriorated as I rediscovered how much time one spends nursing a newborn. Nathan is a good eater, but not a fast one.

Then there was the week where I didn't managed to get food or clothes for myself until almost noon, and that was only through the aid of PBS kids, and a 15 minute nap on the part of the baby. For some reason he didn't want to sleep much in the  morning that week. The house was a mess, I could barely walk in my room, the kitchen was constantly overflowing with dishes, and I was reaching breaking point. I didn't realize it until John asked me: "Do you enjoy being the mother of 3 boys?"

It caught me by surprise. Of course I loved it. I had three sweet boys, and the bigger ones doted on the baby, even if they still fought with each other like cats and dogs. But I was tired, and overwhelmed. John asked what he could do to help, so we spent the next week-end deep cleaning, and getting back to where I could stay on top of things. We found our room again, cleaned up the backyard, and generally reorganized the house. It looked so nice! And amazingly, it still does. It's not always spotless, but I can maintain a lot easier. It's amazing how a clean house can change your outlook.

I'm learning to live with a new kind of normal. Some say the hardest adjustment is when you go from one to two kids, some say from two to three. Both have had their challenges, with John by my side, we can do this. It's been seven weeks now, and the last week or so, I'm finally feeling like things are back to normal. But not the normal of before. A new normal. A normal with a small baby who needs lots of attention, a nearly five year-old who grows more independent by the day, and an almost 3-year-old who wants to be so as well.

The are a great help to me, especially with their baby brother. They adore him, without any of the jealousy I feared from Andrew. He will come and tell me when the baby is crying, then go back and say "Baby Na-fan, it okay" He'll even try to give him his binky. Timothy wants to hold him and talk to him, and will grab diapers for me whenever I need them. If I phrase it right, both will happily unload the dishwasher, or do pretty much any chore I ask. Well, except clean their room. =)

Normal has changed, but I am immensely blessed. I have three beautiful boys, and a wonderful husband without whom I couldn't survive. We make a great team. And cute kids. =)